Inadequacy - original fiction
Jul. 16th, 2009 12:17 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
libra_travellerInadequacy
The sun was glaring into their eyes as they stepped outside the store. The sun was setting so it had to make its last impression for the day. Karen and her mother walked to their car their hands drawn down by their many purchases of clothes.
Karen’s mother Catherine was taller than her daughter who was seventeen years old. Catherine was also lighter of skin, having married a man who was Hispanic. Still they shared a similar build and facial features.
What was most discerning about their relationship was that though Catherine had spent hundreds just now on her daughter, she was very mad at her. You could tell it in the way she only nodded jerkily at Karen’s words. It was also obvious in the tight grip she had on the plastic bags and the way she walked quickly as if hoping her daughter would lag behind so she’d have a reason to yell at her.
They drove home in what would have been an awkward silence if the radio hadn’t been turned on high. It was only after they’d entered their home and the bags were thrown on Karen’s bed did the facade stop.
“I can’t believe you.”
“What did I do that was so wrong?” Karen complained.
Her high pitched words grated on Catherine’s nerves and only made her more irritated. “I can’t believe the way you acted. You’re ungrateful Here I was spending my hard earned money on you, running back and forth to the dressing rooms to make sure everything fit, and yet when we get to the registers you embarrass me.”
“How did I embarrass you, mother? Was it the fact that I didn’t think Papa wanted us to spend so much. I asked you to take off some items. I was trying to save us money, trying not to be selfish for once.” The last words were said sarcastically, for Karen was fed up with her parents accusing her of just that.
Catherine turned red in the face as she bit out a curse. “You implied to complete strangers that I couldn’t afford to get you clothes. Do you know how that made me feel? My god Karen I felt poor. Everyday when I can’t buy you something nice or have to go to the grocery store hampered by all the coupons, I feel poor. When I was your age I had everything I wanted, certainly everything I needed. My parents were doing well, and knowing I can’t live up to what they accomplished and what even they expected of me, I feel like nothing, worthless.” Catherine sat down on the dining room chair. “And I can’t speak of it to your father, because then he thinks that I believe he’s failing us. And it hurts me to see his pride hit like that.”
Karen stood leaning against the wall, uncomfortable with her mother’s vulnerability. “I’m sorry.”
“I saved up to buy you those clothes. They are a gift from me.” With a sigh she continued, “I want you to appreciate it so go impress those guys when you wear them to school.”
Karen smiled. “They’ll kill to have me.” She leant down and kissed Catherine on the cheek. “Thanks mom.”
The sun was glaring into their eyes as they stepped outside the store. The sun was setting so it had to make its last impression for the day. Karen and her mother walked to their car their hands drawn down by their many purchases of clothes.
Karen’s mother Catherine was taller than her daughter who was seventeen years old. Catherine was also lighter of skin, having married a man who was Hispanic. Still they shared a similar build and facial features.
What was most discerning about their relationship was that though Catherine had spent hundreds just now on her daughter, she was very mad at her. You could tell it in the way she only nodded jerkily at Karen’s words. It was also obvious in the tight grip she had on the plastic bags and the way she walked quickly as if hoping her daughter would lag behind so she’d have a reason to yell at her.
They drove home in what would have been an awkward silence if the radio hadn’t been turned on high. It was only after they’d entered their home and the bags were thrown on Karen’s bed did the facade stop.
“I can’t believe you.”
“What did I do that was so wrong?” Karen complained.
Her high pitched words grated on Catherine’s nerves and only made her more irritated. “I can’t believe the way you acted. You’re ungrateful Here I was spending my hard earned money on you, running back and forth to the dressing rooms to make sure everything fit, and yet when we get to the registers you embarrass me.”
“How did I embarrass you, mother? Was it the fact that I didn’t think Papa wanted us to spend so much. I asked you to take off some items. I was trying to save us money, trying not to be selfish for once.” The last words were said sarcastically, for Karen was fed up with her parents accusing her of just that.
Catherine turned red in the face as she bit out a curse. “You implied to complete strangers that I couldn’t afford to get you clothes. Do you know how that made me feel? My god Karen I felt poor. Everyday when I can’t buy you something nice or have to go to the grocery store hampered by all the coupons, I feel poor. When I was your age I had everything I wanted, certainly everything I needed. My parents were doing well, and knowing I can’t live up to what they accomplished and what even they expected of me, I feel like nothing, worthless.” Catherine sat down on the dining room chair. “And I can’t speak of it to your father, because then he thinks that I believe he’s failing us. And it hurts me to see his pride hit like that.”
Karen stood leaning against the wall, uncomfortable with her mother’s vulnerability. “I’m sorry.”
“I saved up to buy you those clothes. They are a gift from me.” With a sigh she continued, “I want you to appreciate it so go impress those guys when you wear them to school.”
Karen smiled. “They’ll kill to have me.” She leant down and kissed Catherine on the cheek. “Thanks mom.”